'The Art of Showing Up' galleys are here!

Yesterday I received galleys of The Art of Showing Up! (A galley is a printed, close-to-final version of a book that is sent out to press/reviewers. It’s made of cheaper materials than the final book will be, and might not be printed in full color or have a finalized layout/design.) I had seen the cover design, of course, but there was something about seeing it IRL as an actual book that was entirely different (in a good way).

I’m feeling very Ahhhhhhh, it’s happening!!! right now. I did two book-adjacent interviews this week, had new headshots taken on Thursday, and then the galleys arrived on Saturday. I definitely had some anxiety last week as the new year kicked off, knowing that 2020 is the year when this book will come out, and feeling very nervous about that fact. May is *just* far enough away to feel like The Great Unknown Future, but it’s also…not that far away at all! I’ll still be essentially the same person in May!!! And showing up is topic that is incredibly close to my heart, so I feel fairly vulnerable putting this into the world.

If you want a sense of what the book is going to be like, here are a few things I’ve written in the past year that either appear in the book or came up when I was researching it:

• On deep-shallow companions

• Two tips to keep in mind if you want to be a better conversationalist

• A modest proposal: Take notes when you’re hanging out with friends

• Not Great, Bob! The Case for Actually Being Honest When People Ask How You Are

You can pre-order The Art of Showing Up via the following retailers:

Amazon

Barnes & Noble

Books-a-Million

Indigo
Bookshop

IndieBound

Powell’s

Workman

(If you’re a bookseller, librarian, or reviewer, you can request an e-galley on NetGalley. And if you have other questions about it, you can email Jennifer Hergenroeder.)

By the way, I’ve learned in the past couple months that there will be a UK edition — Jun. 25 is the date I’ve been told — and an audiobook (which I will likely not be voicing myself). I’ve also had quite a few people ask me if I’ll be doing a book tour, and the answer is that in general, that’s not something that most authors do. But I will probably be doing some events in NYC and Brooklyn, along the East Coast, and (I think!) Chicago. Hopefully there will be many! Despite my nerves and general preference for being home, I am really excited about this topic, so I’m really down to talk about it! ✨

🍑

Just Good Shit: 01.05.20

Image: Kiyana Salkeld / Just Good Shit

Hi! Here’s what I was up to this week…

Reading

I read A Girl Returned, which was…fine. It’s a very quick read (just 160 pages) and it’s well written, but I found the overall subject matter kind of a bummer. It’s a good one to get from the library, I think.

Also:

Australia Is Committing Climate Suicide, The New York Times.
If you’re looking for ways to help, Fire Relief Fund for First Nations Communities and WIRES are two organizations that I donated to.

My Heart Broke. Now What?, ¡Hola Papi!.
I loved this.

The Hunt for Mexico’s Heirloom Beans, The New Yorker.

My favorite posts of the decade, Ask a Manager.

We Learned to Write the Way We Talk, The New York Times.

Embrace the Lasagna, Grub Street.

Eating

On Friday, my gf made Alison Roman’s new NYT recipe, Spicy White Bean Stew With Broccoli Rabe, and it’s good! I’m actually going to make it again tonight. I’m also back on my chickpea pasta bullshit.

NYC

I saw Jacqueline Novak’s excellent Get on Your Knees last night, which I highly, highly recommend. (It’s running through January 26.) Afterward, we had a drink at Cubbyhole, and then went to Don Angie and had the delicious lasagna for two. It was a great cozy date night, and I’m still thinking about how smart and funny the show was.

Have a great Sunday! ✨

Sign up to receive these links each week in an email.

🍑

The best things I read and wrote in 2019

Image: Sincerely Media / Unsplash

Happy New Year’s Eve! As we head into 2020, here are some of my favorite things from 2019…

Writing

The best $16 I ever spent: Old Navy pajamas after my husband left, Vox.

How to Say No During Wedding Season, The New York Times.

The Art of Saying No to Invites When You Really Don't Want to Do Something, SELF.

Not Great, Bob! The Case for Actually Being Honest When People Ask How You Are, SELF.

19 Practical Ways To Get Through Your Bad Season, BuzzFeed.

Reading

This year, I read 30 not-for-work books. The best book was Know My Name by Chanel Miller. Other books I loved/recommend: Bad Blood, Educated, Destiny of the Republic, Red, White, & Royal Blue, In the Dream House, and Nothing to See Here.

Also:

The Trauma Floor — The secret lives of Facebook moderators in America, The Verge.

A 4-Year-Old Trapped in a Teenager’s Body, The Cut.

The Night The Lights Went Out, Deadspin.

The Crane Wife, The Paris Review.

The “Cancel Culture” Con, The New Republic.

Fifty shades of white: the long fight against racism in romance novels, The Guardian.

'These kids are ticking time bombs': The threat of youth basketball, ESPN.

Suzy Batiz’s Empire of Odor, The New Yorker.

I Accidentally Uncovered a Nationwide Scam on Airbnb, VICE.

Athleisure, barre and kale: the tyranny of the ideal woman, The Guardian.

‘For five years we dreaded every meal’: my infant son’s struggle with food, The Guardian.

My Cousin Was My Hero. Until the Day He Tried to Kill Me., The New York Times.

The Catastrophist, or: On coming out as trans at 37, Vox.

The Pink, n+1.

Dear Internet: The Little Mermaid Also Happens to Be Queer Allegory, LitHub.

The End of Straight, GQ.

No distractions: An NFL veteran opens up on his sexuality, ESPN.

Psycho Analysis, Bookforum.

What It’s Like to Grow Up With More Money Than You’ll Ever Spend, The Cut.

Cal Newport on Why We'll Look Back at Our Smartphones Like Cigarettes, GQ.

How “soccer girl” became the indisputably coolest look, Vox.

We Have Always Lived In Presidential Primary Season: A Half-Assed Activist Post About Getting Through This Shitshow Without Perpetuating Or Tolerating Bad Behavior And Keeping Some Tiny Spark Of Hope Alive, Captain Awkward.

How to Date After a Divorce, Lifehacker.

America Has Never Been So Desperate for Tomato Season, The Atlantic.

Happy reading! ✨

🍑

Just Good Shit: 12.29.19

Image: Kiyana Salkeld / Just Good Shit

Hi! Just a quick one for you tonight, as my family is in town visiting right now (and I…literally forgot today was Sunday because it’s Romjul). But I’ll be posting all of my favorite reads from this year tomorrow or Tuesday, if you’re interested in those! In the meantime, here’s what I was up to this week…

Reading

This week, I read Winter Storms and Winter Solstice, and really enjoyed them both. I’m very sad there are no more winter Elin books! Then I read Conversations with Friends which I was…extremely not a fan of. It was my least favorite book of 2019, as a matter of fact.

Also:

Where Rent Is $13,500, She Lives Off What’s Left at the Curb, The New York Times.

The Complicated, Problematic Influence of TripAdvisor Restaurant Reviews, Eater.

How Mariah Carey’s ‘All I Want for Christmas Is You’ Finally Hit No. 1, The New York Times.

The golden age of kids’ YouTube is over. Good., Vox.

Why Carol Has One of the Most Vibrant Fandoms of Any Queer Film, them.

Girls adored ‘Little Women.’ Louisa May Alcott did not., Washington Post.

Lashes, Lashes, Lashes: What It Took to Give the ‘Bombshell’ Women the Fox Look, The New York Times.

Odd Job: the professional gift wrapper who’s having a “really lucrative” holiday season, Vox.

NYC

We saw Derren Brown’s Secret today — Terri nailed the mom in NYC rec yet again! The show is running through January 4, and it’s really delightful; I highly recommend getting tickets if you’re able to go this week! (P.S. Everyone told me to go in not knowing anything/very little about it, and I definitely think that’s the way to go.)

Have a great Sunday! 🌟

Sign up to receive these links each week in an email.

🍑

Just Good Shit: 12.22.19

Image: Kiyana Salkeld / Just Good Shit

I truly cannot believe it’s almost Christmas, but here we are! Here’s what I had going on this week…

On the blog

• I would lay down my life for this Hobonichi Techo planner

Writing

• What Was the Worst Wellness Trend of the 2010s?

Reading

This week, I read Winter Street and I am now reading Winter Stroll, which are both from Elin Hildebrand’s four-part series of winter books, and honestly…these books fucking slap. They are just very chill and funny and juicy, and are quickly becoming some of my favorites of hers so far.

Also…

The Terror Queue, The Verge.

Stop Believing in Free Shipping, The Atlantic.

'We Are Treated As Disposable': Everlane's Customer-Service Employees Are Unionizing, VICE.

@Asher_Wolf on what’s going on with the fires in Australia right now.

Home Alone for Christmas? You're Not the Only One., Food52.
”A pleasure you suffer, an ailment you enjoy.”

Adam Sandler’s Everlasting Shtick, The New York Times Magazine.

The Improbable Insanity of “Cats”, The New Yorker.

Instagram says hiding ‘likes’ isn’t about making more money, Input.

The Year in Canine Curatives, Hazlitt.
I always love reading Hazlitt’s end of year essays.

My Friends Serve Underage Kids Alcohol. Should I Speak Up?, The New York Times.

The Curious Case of Chris Evans’s Sweater in “Knives Out”, The New Yorker.

The 2019 Hater’s Guide to the Williams-Sonoma Catalog, VICE.

Make Party Cocktails By the Pitcher Rather Than the Glass, Lifehacker.

The Decade in Internet Culture, in 34 Emblematic Posts, New York Magazine.
I fully lost my shit over “this bewildering TikTok.”

Watching

I’ve watched so many things in the past few weeks! I watched the first three episodes of The Morning Show, which is……..not good. (This review perfectly sums up my feelings on it.) I saw Uncut Gems, which is just so chaotic and extremely too much while also being weirdly boring, but I didn’t hate it either. (Kevin Garnett is great in it.) I watched Carol for the first time this weekend (though I’d read the book). And I saw Knives Out, which is fun, and a very good one to see if you’re with family/bored this week.

Have a great Sunday! 🎅

Sign up to receive these links each week in an email.

🍑

I would lay down my life for this Hobonichi Techo planner

I’d been thinking about buying a Hobonichi Techo Cousin planner ($35.04) for two years, so I finally decided to go for it this fall. It’s just such a good planner, and after four years of dot journaling in a Leuchtturm notebook, I’m ready for a little change! I ordered my Hobonichi Techo Cousin back in October, and I’m legitimately looking forward to January 1 so I can start using it.

Here’s the deal with the Hobonichi Techo, from the website:

The Hobonichi Techo is a planner notebook created by staff members of the website Hobo Nikkan Itoi Shinbun, shortened as Hobonichi. Techo (pronounced “tetch-oh”) is a Japanese word for a planner notebook. We also describe the Hobonichi Techo as a Life Book; it demonstrates the planner notebook’s versatility and freedom that accommodates every user’s unique personality and lifestyle. It first came out as a 2002 edition, which was created when the members — who weren’t professional planner designers — decided to get together and create a brand new kind of planner that they would actually want to use themselves. There are 18 years of history behind the current book. New varieties have appeared over the years in response to customer requests, and all the techos improve every year based on these requests and feedback. New cover designs are released every year so that using a Hobonichi Techo carries an extra sense of excitement and enjoyment. In recent years people from all over the world have begun to use the techo — there are now over 780,000 users worldwide!

I was able to look at several different Hobonichi Techo planners back in late 2017, and the Cousin was my personal favorite. (It was also my favorite of all of the planners I looked at in 2017, and I looked at…a fuckton of planners that year.) It’s more guided than a dot journal — but not annoyingly so — and really nails both form and function.

I highly recommend going to the Cousin’s About section and clicking through all of the different tabs to see/read about the features, because there are a lot of them! But here are some of the things I like about it, if you’re curious…

Size

The Cousin (the A5) is the biggest of all of the Techo planners, but isn’t huge…it’s 5.8” x 8.3”, so it’s fairly close in size to the Leuchtturm I’ve been using for years. It is the perfect size for me.

If you want a smaller planner, the original Hobonichi Techo (A6) ($20.02) is also good. (You can also buy the original on Amazon.) I actually bought the original by accident because I got confused when I was placing my order. (One way to remember which one is which: the Cousin is the big one, much like Cousin Greg is the big one on Succession.) While the original is perfectly nice (and my girlfriend is happy to take it off my hands), I prefer one with more room to write on each day, aka the Cousin.

The paper

Ugh, this notebook. I just love it! The paper is super thin and smooth and feels so luxurious. The journal also has layflat binding (which means it will easily lay open/flat on your desk).

Image: Hobonichi Techo

The cream-colored cover is lovely, and even though it’s super lightweight, it’s surprisingly durable. (I tried bending the corners of the sample one I received, and couldn’t.) You can also buy a cover for it, but I didn’t go that route; instead, I bought a mesh pouch at McNally Jackson to transport it in.

There are different colors of ink used throughout the journal (the daily pages for each month are printed in a different color, for example) but the colors still feel fairly neutral. Also, a lot of the grids and other details are designed to be guidelines that you can only see up close (similar to the dots in a dot grid journal), so those are printed in a fairly light ink.

The page design

So, the big difference between this planner and the dot journaling method is that the Cousin is pre-printed. So, the pages come with dates and other information already on them, and each day gets its own page. There is also a year-at-glance view, monthly calendar pages, a spot for goals/tasks each month, weekly pages (with an hourly breakdown that I like a lot), and then the daily pages. This isn’t ideal if you want to be able to write really long journal entries some days, or to add in a new spread about, say, your favorite books wherever you feel like it. But it’s great if you want something convenient that is kind of doing the work for you, and/or you don’t mind when your journal or planner bosses you around a little bit.

I tend to be way too picky to enjoy pre-designed daily pages, but in this case, they are designed so well and so thoughtfully that I really like them. There’s an hourly breakdown on the left side of the page if you want to use it (but that’s easy to ignore), and then there is space on the right where you can list tasks/to-dos. (There is also a light “invisible line” down the middle that you can use to separate the two if you want to.) And there is space at the bottom for journaling/notes. You can also use the daily pages as a sketchbook or regular journal…like, you can just kind of easily write or doodle over the printed page designs if you want.

Features

The Cousin has several thoughtful/cute touches throughout that I love, including the moon phase on each daily page; subtle color tabs for each month of the year; a mini monthly calendar every two pages; and a “warm up page” at the beginning where you can reflect on the past year/set the tone of the new year. In the back of the notebook, there is blank graph paper; a “Favorites” page where you can document your favorite songs, movies, books, purchases, etc.; and a “My 100” page that you can use for anything you want (wins, top moments, goals, favorites, etc.).

Another thing people seem to love about these planners is that they have a quote on each page. This is actually not my thing, but it’s sort of moot because in the Cousin, all the quotes are in Japanese, so I can’t read them.

Shopping

I will say that the Hobonichi Techo website is a tad hard to navigate, in part because there some choices to be made: you have to figure out which planner you want, and whether you’d like the week starts to start on Sunday or Monday. You can also buy the Cousin Avec, where you get two notebooks that each last six months instead of one notebook for the whole year. And if you want to pick out a cover, there are a lot of options.

Once you make your selection, you’ll get routed to a different interface to purchase, and you’ll have to make sure it’s all in USD. It’s also not the most user friendly, but it’s also not prohibitively difficult to use. And both notebooks I ordered arrived very quickly (especially considering that they were shipping from Japan).

TL;DR: The Hobonichi Techo Cousin planner is super elegant and well-designed, and I am very excited to start using mine in January! Buy the 2020 Cousin for $35.04. 🗓

🍑

Just Good Shit: 12.15.19

Image: Kiyana Salkeld / Just Good Shit

Happy Sunday! Here’s what I’ve got for you this week…

On the blog

• Holiday gift ideas for the Everlane-loving, shit-together homebody in your life

• Holiday gift ideas for the well-dressed, blob-loving creative in your life

Writing

• What to Do When a Perfectly Lovely Friend Is Kind of the Worst Online

From the archives

• 37 Holiday Self-Care Tips For Anyone Who Is Kind Of Not OK RN

• How To Spend Christmas Alone

Reading

The Age of Instagram Face, The New Yorker.

A Beginner's Guide to Hosting Family for the Holidays Without Melting Down, VICE.

Why Is It So Shocking That Someone Would Love a Fat Person?, Glamour.

How High Can High-Waisted Pants Go?, The New Yorker.

Add Bitters to Royal Icing for Better Christmas Cookies, Lifehacker.

“Attention undergrads: many of you have not yet gotten to know your neighborhood librarians,” Dr. Nedda Mehdizadeh on Twitter.

Before and After: This Rental Kitchen DIY Is the Best Thing on the Internet, Apartment Therapy.
This look so good!

Update: talking about my pregnancy at work when I’m placing the baby for adoption, Ask a Manager.
Cry warning.

TIL why it gets so quiet when it snows, Reddit.

Just Save Some Parties for January, The Cut.
This is absolutely correct.

NYC

On Friday night, some friends and I gathered together for a holiday dinner/drinks at Alameda, and then decided to go across the street to The Springs for more drinks. The Springs was…incredible. It was completely decked out for Christmas (lights everywhere, TVs playing yule logs over every booth) and everyone there was dressed to the theme. (Outfits ranged from festive sweaters to full on nativity scene costumes.) Te DJ was playing great music and everyone was dancing. It was such a good vibe, it felt like crashing someone’s excellent holiday party (and stumbling across it felt like Christmas/New York magic). Turns out, it’s their annual Ho Ho Holiday Lounge. If you are in the area and want a good festive time between now and January 1, I highly recommend it!

Have a great Sunday! ✨

Sign up to receive these links each week in an email.

🍑

Holiday gift ideas for the well-dressed, blob-loving creative in your life

Hello! I’m back with some more gift ideas for you! Sunday’s list was general gift ideas and Monday’s list was gifts for someone who reminds you of me; today’s list is gifts for someone who maybe reminds you a little bit of me, but whose taste is, say, 25% cooler and 60% more colorful. Like, this person fucks with a simple J. Crew sweater and a can of chickpeas, but also has good taste in music and wears hip art teacher earrings, you know? It is 100% inspired by my girlfriend and the things she owns/loves/has on her wishlist, though there’s definitely some overlap with my own. Anyway, if you are shopping for someone who is the Claudia to your Stacey, this list might be helpful.

Cold Picnic bathmat

I love this brand, and their bathmats are absolutely the gateway drug. I actually bought the one pictured at a sample sale in the spring, but there are a ton of other styles, including multiple boob mats. Buy it from Cold Picnic for $60.

Boy Smells candle

All the Boy Smells candles are beautiful, and the Cedar Stack is really nice but mellow woodsy smell. Buy it from Amazon for $36.

Supersoft mockneck sweater

This was in Tuesday’s gift guide, because, again, it’s so versatile. Available in 13 colors and sizes XXS-3X from J. Crew for $89.50.

Just Say No to Bullshit socks

For when you want to tell your coworkers to fuck off, but can’t. Buy them from Electric West for $15.

Face planter

You know Toilets With Menacing Auras? This planter is, like, the cosmic opposite of that. It’s charming but not overly twee, and has just good, sweet energy. Buy it from Group Partner for $65.

Nothing Fancy: Unfussy Food for Having People Over

Another gift that would definitely appeal to Monday’s homebody! This is a great cookbook — even better than Dining In — and is aesthetically and spiritually aligned with many of the other items on this list. Buy it from Amazon for $20.12 or find it at a local bookstore through IndieBound.

Fujifilm Instax Mini 9

This camera is easy to use, takes super flattering photos, and is extremely fun at a party. (You’ll get way better fun action shots than you do with a phone, honestly.) It’s also a very gentle entry point for anyone who has been thinking about getting into film photography. It comes in 10 colors; get the camera and two packs of film on Amazon for $67.86. (Urban Outfitters also has some very cute exclusive colors, including lavender, yellow, orange, and rose.)

Enamelware serving bowl

This was a purchase directly inspired by the aesthetic of Nothing Fancy, and looks way more expensive than it actually is. It’s a good size for holding a few lemons or onions and some heads of garlic. It comes in four colors; buy it from Amazon for $14.88.

Bodum French Press

This is another gift that looks more expensive than it is. It makes a single cup of coffee or tea and is really easy to use. If someone is lightly interested in getting into coffee, it’s a good place to start. The Chemex gets a lot of attention because it’s so beautiful, but it takes a decent amount of effort to make coffee with it. Meanwhile, this little press is quick/unfussy enough to use before work.

The MoMA Design Store has the Caffettiera French press pictured and a second multicolored one for $20; Madewell has a pastel version for $15; and there’s a light green one and a light blue one on Amazon for $15. If you want to gift it with some coffee, Variety Coffee tastes good and has great packaging. (In Brooklyn, you can buy it at Whole Foods.)

Yellow silicone finger grippers and lavender scraper

These are good stocking stuffers and/or a great addition to the Nothing Fancy cookbook. (Alison Roman apparently loves a scraper.) Buy them from Amazon; the grippers are $6.06 and the scraper is $5.99.

Dusen Dusen hand towels

Dusen Dusen has really unique patterns and prints, and is good for anyone who has walked into a Madewell in the past year and thought, “Boy, everyone sure is depressed, huh?” Most of Dusen Dusen’s clothing and home goods are pretty expensive, so the hand towels are fairly affordable and offer a good amount of color/pattern bang for your buck. Available in four styles; buy them for $20 each from Coming Soon.

Bathing lady dish

Who is she??? This multipurpose dish (for keys, change, jewelry, etc.) is fun and kind of unusual, and has a vintage vibe that isn’t too stuck in a particular era. It comes in five colors; buy one from Coming Soon for $40.

Areaware goober candles

These candles are less “I’m burning my scented candle for self-care,” and more “I have cool blobs on my bookshelf that make me happy, and sure, I could burn them if I wanted to.” Available in four colors; buy them from Coming Soon for $26 each.

Catbird loopdie earring

This shape of these earrings — open at the top and bottom — is fairly unusual, but the earrings themselves are not fussy at all. They are basically gold hoop earrings…that fuck. (BTW, a lot of cool/weird earrings are hard to put on or take off, but these are very user-friendly.) Buy them from Catbird — $88 for the gold pair and $52 for the silver pair.

Catbird teardrop earring

Another pair of “classic silhouette, but more interesting version of it” earrings. They aren’t full-on statement pieces, but they are unique enough to communicate to the recipient “I noticed you have good style so I got you something a little bit interesting.” Buy them from Catbird — $52 for the silver pair or $88 for the gold pair.

And a year of Spotify Premium

Spotify is something most people use every single day, but it’s something most people don’t think about using every single day because it’s literally in the background. So a gift card for a Premium account (or to cover the cost of their current subscription.) ends up being a super practical gift that is still fairly unexpected/delightful. (It’s also a good one for a couple!) Get a 3-month ($30) or 6-month ($60) gift card from Target, or get the $99 annual gift card from Best Buy.

And, of course, you can’t go wrong with some of the OG gift guide items here: the hot honey, the Chups socks, and The Art of Gathering would be my picks. ✨

🍑

Holiday gift ideas for the Everlane-loving, shit-together homebody in your life

While yesterday’s gift idea list was meant to be pretty general, I thought it might also be fun to put together some ideas for people whose taste is more specific. Or, in this case, whose taste is just…mine. Though I don’t actually love/shop at Everlane all that much, I recognize that a Type exists, and I am a part of it! If you’re shopping for gifts for your sister/best friend/girlfriend/wife/some other cozy Millennial (or just…yourself…) this list might be helpful.

A New York Times crossword puzzle app subscription

This is, to me, an ideal gift, because it’s one of those things that is kind of annoying to pay for yourself, but is actually not that expensive as far as gifts are concerned. It’s also just really worth having! I have been cranking through the archives recently to get better at solving/be on Instagram and Twitter less. Buy it for $19.97.

The perfect lemon candle

This is, in my estimation, the perfect lemon candle. Buy it from Williams-Sonoma for $19.95.

J. Crew x Chups socks

These socks spark so much joy for me. After looking at them online every few weeks for like three months, I finally bought myself a couple pairs on Black Friday last year when they were half-price. They were so great that I was ready and waiting to buy them this year on Black Friday when they were 50% off. I am slowly but surely building my great sock collection. They come in four colors; get a single pair from J. Crew for $36 or a pack of two pairs for $62. (And also…definitely buy them during one of J. Crew’s many sales.)

Lodge Dutch oven

This is a great Dutch oven (it’s the Wirecutter pick) and the cream color is really lovely in person. It’s become the most-used pot in my kitchen. Buy it from Amazon for $59.90.

450-piece boob puzzle

A puzzle! With titties! Honestly, what more do you want from me? Buy it from Jiggy (a new brand that also has other, non-boob puzzles) for $40.

USB rechargeable lighter

This is one of those things that I didn’t know I needed until I saw it — during a sale, when I immediately impulse-bought it. It’s very beautiful and also the way it works is genuinely neat; instead of casting a flame, it just sort of…zaps your candle wicks and then they start to burn! Available in four colors; buy it from Food52 for $32.

Chenille throw blanket

For everyone who says, “Can you hand me that blanket?” approximately 10 times a day. Available in three colors; buy it from West Elm for $39 (FYI, it’s currently on sale for $19).

A Shhhowercap

I have had my Shhhowercap for a couple years now, and it is probably the most-used item in my home, now that I think about it. It’s a splurge, but if for anyone who doesn’t wash their hair that often, it’s absolutely worth it. Available in 13 colors; buy the dark pink one from Amazon for $43 or one of the other colors from Sephora.

Teeny hoop earrings

I have a lot of thoughts about gold hoop earrings, but the TL;DR is that these are great earrings. Get them from Catbird — $88 for the gold set and $28 for the silver set.

Supersoft mockneck sweater

This sweater has made a mockneck believer out of me! It’s cozy without being sloppy, and is simple enough that it actually fits a lot of different personal styles. Available in 13 colors and sizes XXS-3X from J. Crew for $89.50.

Velvet shell pillow

I have been in love with these pillows for nearly all of 2019, and finally bought myself one on Black Friday. They aren’t cheap, but are truly beautiful and special. Available in eight colors; buy it from Tamar Mogendorff for $90.

And jasmine mint toothpaste

I just love this fancy toothpaste. Buy it from Amazon for $10.34.

Also! A few items from yesterday’s list would be great for this person too, particularly the hot honey, salt box, The Art of Gathering, beeswax wraps, Home Comforts, and rosehip oil. ✨

🍑

Just Good Shit: 12.08.19

Image: Kiyana Salkeld / Just Good Shit

Hi, friends! Here’s what I was up to this week…

On the blog

• Everything I'm doing to be the moistest woman in Brooklyn this winter

• Holiday gift ideas for pretty much everyone in your life

Two more gift guides still to come this week!

Reading

So, my gf and I both finished The Song of Achilles this weekend and…did not love it? I had heard nothing but good things about it, and it’s a great premise, but I just couldn’t get into it. There was so much war, and the main characters just didn’t have developed personalities. I really liked Circe so I had high hopes, but this one felt less like a reimagining of a myth and more like homework. (It honestly just felt…very straight.) But, again, I’d heard rave reviews from everyone else who read it, so YMMV!

Also:

Emotional Baggage: Inside the Toxic Work Environment at Away, The Verge.

Pinterest and The Knot Pledge to Stop Promoting Plantation Weddings, The New York Times.

In Defense of Just Eating Your Dang Thanksgiving Dinner at Luby’s, Texas Monthly.
This is so good.

How to Go Home for the Holidays When Your Family Is a Bit Much, VICE.

My home is unsafe for me to explore my gender. What do I do?, Asking Bear.

Practicing Abundance in Daily Life, No. 17.
This is Christian, which is not personally my jam, but I still liked it.

Work should be over when it gets dark, The Outline.

My Wife’s Enemies Are Now My Enemies, Too, The Cut.

The best office holiday party date story of all time, Ask a Manager.

I’m Upset: Do not give me ketchup packets, The Outline.
I love condiments and also this take!

Living

I watched this YouTube tutorial before putting lights on my Christmas tree and it was really helpful! Speaking of Christmas lights, I’ve been on a mission to find the best twinkle lights to leave up on your home year-round for like a year now, and I can report that Target’s Wondershop White Satin G40 Indoor/Outdoor Globe Lights are perfect. They give off an an incredibly dreamy candle-like glow, and cost $10 a box.

Laughing, Loving

“POV: you’re a close friend venting to me about a situation where you were entirely in the wrong.”

“Aaron earned an iron urn.”

And this lesbian meme/viral moment of the year thread.

Have a great Sunday! 🎄

Sign up to receive these links each week in an email.

🍑